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Reasons for men to stay single
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  1. #1
    Cooking my own meals would be an adventure, not a punishment.

    I wouldn't have to explain why I'm wearing "that" shirt with "those" pants.

    I could leave the toilet seat in any position I damn well please.

    I could actually tell the bartender, "If anyone calls, I'm here".

    I'd be painting the town instead of the house.

    When I get home after work, I don't have to start work again.

    I could show my girlfriend where I live.

    I'd be driving a miniskirt instead of a minivan.

    The only weeds I'd be concerned with are the ones I'm rolling.

    I would have saved $372,416.21 in groceries by now.

    I wouldn't catch so much grief about those skid-marks in my underwear!

    I'd get to see what my paycheck looks like.

    I'd get to see what my credit cards look like.

    You can see a different face when you wake up in the morning, every day of the week!

    Going to a strip club doesn't have to be a covert mission.

    Bachelors don't have Mother-in-laws.

    I wouldn't have to watch sub-titled French films.

    I could home drunk to sleep, instead of under a bridge.

    I could use my own name at hotels.

    I wouldn't have a driving instructor grading me every time I go somewhere.

    When asked his opinion, a single guy can say "Hell yes, you're fat!".
    Swap meet Sally,Tramp stamp kat,mousewife to momshell in the time it took for you to get that new Tattoo.Tattoo Tattoo!

  2. #2
    No cheer******s allowed!
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
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    28,415
    The single life sucks!!!
    The woman i truly loved appears to have had enough of my insecurities and endless mood swings, so here i am.
    On the upside, i have more money to waste on Van Halen bootlegs & memorabilia! :184:

  3. #3
    Band Manager
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Birmingham West midlands England
    Posts
    3,312
    Originally posted by Prettywoman5150@Jan 16 2005, 01:43 PM


    The only weeds I'd be concerned with are the ones I'm rolling.

    Well some things never change!! :lol:


    Brum, the birth place and home of Heavy metal music, and the occasional twister.

    Al says 'Rules is rules and if there isn't any rules then where would we be? thats right; France!'
    Australian women, genetically bred for bar work! cheers.
    http://www3.youtube.com/watch?v=4Lze...arch=aerosmith
    "Thats captain Jack sparrow"

  4. #4
    THEE bassist for VH
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Location
    someplace you're not
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    Most of those apply!


  5. #5
    Mr Mod Extraordinare
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
    Location
    Chicago area
    Posts
    6,092
    Originally posted by unchainedguitars@Jan 16 2005, 11:54 AM
    The single life sucks!!!
    The woman i truly loved appears to have had enough of my insecurities and endless mood swings, so here i am.
    With my wife's insecurities & mood swings--I wish I were single!!! h34r:
    LIGHT 'EM UP!!
    Smoke 'em if you got 'em!

    siN / DDLR Moderator

  6. #6
    No cheer******s allowed!
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Posts
    28,415
    Originally posted by NE169+Jan 16 2005, 06:51 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (NE169 @ Jan 16 2005, 06:51 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-unchainedguitars@Jan 16 2005, 11:54 AM
    The single life sucks&#33;&#33;&#33;
    The woman i truly loved appears to have had enough of my insecurities and endless mood swings, so here i am.
    With my wife&#39;s insecurities & mood swings--I wish I were single&#33;&#33;&#33; h34r: [/b][/quote]
    HAHA&#33; I guess we all have our insecurities and mood swings. And some of us are just plain crazy...like Wayne. LOL.

  7. #7
    Dance Baby!
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    Peoples Republic of Seattle
    Posts
    6,073
    Originally posted by NE169+Jan 16 2005, 06:51 PM--></div><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (NE169 @ Jan 16 2005, 06:51 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin-unchainedguitars@Jan 16 2005, 11:54 AM
    The single life sucks&#33;&#33;&#33;
    The woman i truly loved appears to have had enough of my insecurities and endless mood swings, so here i am.
    With my wife&#39;s insecurities & mood swings--I wish I were single&#33;&#33;&#33; h34r: [/b][/quote]
    Sing It From Top The Mountain, Brothers&#33; Amen.
    Daniel (1994-2013)

  8. #8
    Metal Up Your A$$!
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Far, far away
    Posts
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    Use the same pair of socks for, at least, one week.
    Make coffee, put it in a glass jar, make it hot using a microwave oven. :blink:
    Wash your tennis shoes? What for? :lol:
    Cook the best cake. But only you consider it. :P
    Wolfgang Van Halen - "I love being a bass player. Its just me and Al a groove section. Just boom, boom, boom, and were good". GW
    ---
    Edward Van Halen - "What is next for Wolf is the next record and the next tour. Hes no different than I am. Music is his life. If he goes back to school, Ill probably go with him. GC

  9. #9
    Band Manager
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    Birmingham West midlands England
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    One of my mates got himself a flat after splitting with his girlfriend. Because he never wanted to wash up ever again, he only used paper plates and plastic knives and forks. :lol:


    Brum, the birth place and home of Heavy metal music, and the occasional twister.

    Al says 'Rules is rules and if there isn't any rules then where would we be? thats right; France!'
    Australian women, genetically bred for bar work! cheers.
    http://www3.youtube.com/watch?v=4Lze...arch=aerosmith
    "Thats captain Jack sparrow"

  10. #10
    Metal Up Your A$$!
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    Far, far away
    Posts
    14,465
    Great story, Stevan. :85:
    I remember I saw The Simpsons episode and Moe, the barman used to use bread packages to cover his feet in order not to waste his shoes and not to dirty it.
    Wolfgang Van Halen - "I love being a bass player. Its just me and Al a groove section. Just boom, boom, boom, and were good". GW
    ---
    Edward Van Halen - "What is next for Wolf is the next record and the next tour. Hes no different than I am. Music is his life. If he goes back to school, Ill probably go with him. GC

 

 

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